This year has been absolutely, as Charles Barkley would say, “turrible” in Sports. Alabama won the football championship, Kentucky won the basketball championship, and Tennessee has seen less than stellar rebuilding campaigns fall impotently short in both sports. But last night, Kentucky fans gave something back to all of us, they reminded us why they are the stupidest fan base in the country, and we were allowed to enjoy the spectacle for a brief moment via the Lexington Police Scanner.
For those of you who weren’t following the drama unfold online and on twitter, last night, students and fans in Lexington began to riot after the Wildcats National Championship victory.
As far as I know, the first person to tweet the link to the Lexington Police Scanner was a Columbus, Oh. sports radio host named Adam Neft. Within 30 minutes, Twitter was exploding, and the hilarity was only beginning. By the end of the night, #LexingtonPoliceScanner was the #1 trend worldwide (ironically, the actual basketball game never did).
I tuned in around 1 am and one of the first things I heard was, and I quote, “We just had a flash mob and everyone said they were gonna shoot everybody.”
The scene was absolute pandaemonium. Here’s some of my favorites quotes from the scanner.
“Get everyone out that went back in, they’ve retaken the street.”
“Garage on fire.”
“We have a partially nude male with a propane tank.”
“When making arrests, watch for bottles.”
“Subject surfing on top of a car.”
“EVERYONE MAINTAIN SQUAD INTEGRITY! GET OUT OF THE STREETS LETS NOT MAKE OURSELVES A TARGET STANDING IN THE STREET.”
At one point, a man was even shot (he lived), the perpetrator, said to be in UK gear, was not found.
What does all this mean? Basically it confirms an age-old belief we hold at the University of Tennessee-Knoxville: Kentucky has the stupidest fan base. Just when we thought Harvey Updyke would give Bama the crown, a mob of Kentucky fans reiterates the point and takes back the belt.
Hundreds of burning couches, 56 reported fires, and oodles of arrests later, all of our notions have been confirmed.
Congratulations Cats, you earned it.